Friday, September 23, 2022

A Tale From Araby, circa 1995

 * Today's post courtesy of MathMom *



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This little story could be a Saudi rom-com, where a guy wants to get married, so he puts his parents on the task and they find him a wife.  The tradition, which, in the 1990’s, was still followed by most families, was to negotiate a bride price with an eligible girl’s father, pay up, and she would be brought to the wedding.  The groom and bride would meet on the wedding day.  The bride would be veiled.  The new husband would get to lift her veil, and if he didn’t like what he saw, he could reject her, and the deal would be off. 

In this story, the future groom was one of MathMan’s employees.  He had quite a few guys of marriage age working for him, and they told him how it was becoming difficult to get married unless a guy had a house.  It was so important, that the company gave men of marriage age interest-free loans for SR50,000 (roughly $20K in 1995) to enable them to build a house, which improved their marketability.  The price for a good bride (not some tribal/bedou girl) was also about SR50,000  so a guy who had already spent SR50,000 building a villa, was well into his bank account before he got to the altar. 

The family of MathMan’s employee was super liberal.  They were going to try that new thing that some families were permitting – they’d allow the future bride and groom to meet, once, before the wedding.  The groom might even get to see his future bride’s face.  The future groom’s hands were sweating.  The future bride was brought in, with her chaperone, probably a brother.  The future groom said, “Do you have any questions?”  The list of potential questions could fill a book.

This girl took her opportunity.  She asked him, “Do you have a nice house?”  He said, “Yes.”  She said, “OK. I’ll marry you.”  That was it.  Her future was now sealed.   In a month or so, she would become his property, and would start having children.

When MathMan told me about her question and answer, I felt like I was going to cry.  The future groom told MathMan, in a low, quiet voice, that he got to see her face, and she was pretty.  At least she wouldn’t be returned at the altar. 

So, if you were the bride, and you had the opportunity to ask questions, what would you ask?

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