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“Lead the way, Ramona!” I trilled! “I am literally jumping at the chance!” I was already slipping into those arm straps. Fear never seemed to enter the picture after we had talked and shared chocolate.
“We have to go uphill for a while. My cave is up there against the rocky side of the mountain. We’ll have to cross the road…”
She grabbed Twigg and tossed him up into the air so that he came down on her shoulders face front, laughing. I had never seen that done before. Good trick! You would probably get arrested for that where I live.
I didn’t turn on any kind of tracking. Seemed like a sneaky thing to do, so I did't. If she didn’t want photos, she probably didn’t want their exact location known either.
The girl had quite a stride. Being around seven feet tall and even walking slowly her steps were at least four feet apart. But I hustled along behind her, still rather agog at what I was seeing. A blond giantess and her child striding lightly up through the same meadow that I had walked down a while earlier. She left almost no sign of her passing. I was looking for big footprints. But she did that kind of floating walking thing. I’ve seen wolves do that.
We passed Elise in her parking spot up at the road. No one else was around so we would cause no excited reports in the Cryptid networks. Too bad!
The conditions on the other side of the road were totally different. It was dark for one thing. We were under Douglas Firs and some Alders and we were in the shadow of the mountain itself. The light from the sky disappeared. Ramona made her own light. A glowing presence, she walked further and further into the gloom. Twigg kept turning his neckless little torso around to make sure that I was keeping up. I tried not to think about No Neck jokes.
Soon we were among rocks. Our path threaded between boulders. They got bigger and bigger until we were just passing between rocks like small buildings. Here and there were stacked rock towers. I would ask about them later. It became silent. No birdsong. No wind.
“We’re nearly there Nikky,” she tossed back over her shoulder. She was not much like the chick in the Patterson film. Ramona had a waist for one thing.
At last, we came to a rocky face where the trail ended. There was an opening maybe six feet high with a bit of an overhanging outcropping just above this opening. This was the cave. Under the overhang, but not inside the cave was a fireplace built of a circle of largish rocks. There was some ironwork structure inside the circle also, such as you might hang a pot on.
“Is Ralph home, Ramona?” I was not so sure about him. My confidence flagged a bit. I felt somewhat out there, if you know what I mean.
“Oh, he will be, do you want to see inside?” “Sure,” I said. The day was getting on, but I was very curious about her home. As it turned out, it was exactly what you might expect in a Sasquatch house. Sparse, well swept. One big bed made of interwoven branches, but with a suspiciously human looking quilt on it. A really big quilt.
There was also a kitchen area. Two large rocks coming out of the wall of the cave held a sturdy door and on this door were some basic cooking supplies and dishes. This seemed like a new development to me.
About then, I heard a sort of crackling sound and smelled a little whiff of ozone. Looking back outside I just caught a glimpse of a fading circle of red light, quite large. As it faded the person who had to be Ralph stepped through and appeared to solidify before my eyes. He made Ramona look like a kitten! His body was dark espresso brown, he had to be over eight feet tall. His shoulders were five feet across. Like his son, he had no neck to speak of. His arms almost reached his knees. But he was smiling! He also had a rather flat face and large brown eyes.
“Nikky, this is Ralph, he doesn’t bite,” she laughed. I must have looked overly impressed. “Ralph, this is Nikky. She was sent up here to find out if we are real!”
“Hey, Nikky! I’ve got a nice little clearing near here with some logs to sit on, why don’t we talk there?”, said Ralph!
There was another fireplace in the clearing and some conveniently laid logs, in a cozy circle.
Twigg ran around gathering some, um, twigs and sticks, enough for a small campfire. Ralph whipped out a Bic and lit it. He seemed to be wearing a small silver toned cross body bag. The firelight lit all three of their faces as they looked at me. Dreamlike imagery. Flickering light on those inscrutable large faces. I thought then of many deep pasts.
“So, are you content? Do we seem real to you Nikky,” asked Ralph.
“Well, Ralph, sir, that’s just the very point I was about to bring up, in a way. My client wants photos and maybe some video. He wants solid, human style, proof. At this point I know, of course, that you are as real as I am. But back down there in town my word will count for nothing! I would just be counted as another Squatch hunter coming out of the woods all wild eyed and crazy.”
“Aw, Nikky. That’s just not how it works. Our definition requires that we are unknown. We are a mystery. If you were to prove our existence it would change us forever. I don’t think we would cease to exist, but I can’t say what we would become. I just don’t know!
“It is your fate to know something that you cannot prove. There will always be that open spot in the world. An unknown quantity, as it were.”
I said, “I will accept that. It’s graceful. But will you tell me about those little rock towers on the path up here among the stones? Do they have meaning? Or are they merely pleasant to look at.”
His thunderous laughter filled the woods. “Those are stone cold jokes, Nikky! It’s hard to explain. We like to leave them for each other to find! When one of our people finds one, it just brightens their day!” I had the feeling that I had crossed some sort of line with that question and that he just wasn't going to tell me.
I sensed that the interview was coming to a close. I stood up.
“Thank you, both, for talking with me today. I will never forget you. Of that you may be sure. Your baby is adorable. I will find my way back down to my car, while there is still some daylight. Goodbye, truly,” I said.
I walked alone back down to where Elise was parked. I drove back out of the forest by way of the forest service road. Then I took the paved route back into town. The two-hour drive gave me lots of time to think. I reached a conclusion at last.
When I got home in the early evening, I sat down on the sofa next to where Richard was tending to his grooming and called Steve.
“Hi, Steve,” I started.
“Nikky! How did it go? Did you find her? What happened? How are you, anyhow?” He sounded pretty excited, for a client.
“Steve, I’m pooped. Really tired. I wandered all over the area where your students said they saw her, and I found nothing out of the ordinary. Nothing. It was a nice day in the woods. That’s all. I ate a bag of Dove chocolates and I have a sick stomach. Oink!”
“Well, damn. We had to try. I thought maybe she would come to you. How much do I owe you, Nikky?”
“Don’t be mad at your students Steve. We still don’t know for sure what they saw, or think they saw,” I said. “You don’t have to know anything about it at all.”
“Hey Steve, you don’t owe me anything. Why don’t you just take me to dinner tomorrow. I’m too tired tonight. Wait. No! Why don’t you come over here and I will make dinner tomorrow. How about that? Around six or so.”
Long silence. I could hear him thinking, I thought.
“Okay, Nikky. That sounds good. Very good. I’ll see you tomorrow at six!”
I smiled at Richard and messed up his fur, so he had to start again.
“We have to go uphill for a while. My cave is up there against the rocky side of the mountain. We’ll have to cross the road…”
She grabbed Twigg and tossed him up into the air so that he came down on her shoulders face front, laughing. I had never seen that done before. Good trick! You would probably get arrested for that where I live.
I didn’t turn on any kind of tracking. Seemed like a sneaky thing to do, so I did't. If she didn’t want photos, she probably didn’t want their exact location known either.
The girl had quite a stride. Being around seven feet tall and even walking slowly her steps were at least four feet apart. But I hustled along behind her, still rather agog at what I was seeing. A blond giantess and her child striding lightly up through the same meadow that I had walked down a while earlier. She left almost no sign of her passing. I was looking for big footprints. But she did that kind of floating walking thing. I’ve seen wolves do that.
We passed Elise in her parking spot up at the road. No one else was around so we would cause no excited reports in the Cryptid networks. Too bad!
The conditions on the other side of the road were totally different. It was dark for one thing. We were under Douglas Firs and some Alders and we were in the shadow of the mountain itself. The light from the sky disappeared. Ramona made her own light. A glowing presence, she walked further and further into the gloom. Twigg kept turning his neckless little torso around to make sure that I was keeping up. I tried not to think about No Neck jokes.
Soon we were among rocks. Our path threaded between boulders. They got bigger and bigger until we were just passing between rocks like small buildings. Here and there were stacked rock towers. I would ask about them later. It became silent. No birdsong. No wind.
“We’re nearly there Nikky,” she tossed back over her shoulder. She was not much like the chick in the Patterson film. Ramona had a waist for one thing.
At last, we came to a rocky face where the trail ended. There was an opening maybe six feet high with a bit of an overhanging outcropping just above this opening. This was the cave. Under the overhang, but not inside the cave was a fireplace built of a circle of largish rocks. There was some ironwork structure inside the circle also, such as you might hang a pot on.
“Is Ralph home, Ramona?” I was not so sure about him. My confidence flagged a bit. I felt somewhat out there, if you know what I mean.
“Oh, he will be, do you want to see inside?” “Sure,” I said. The day was getting on, but I was very curious about her home. As it turned out, it was exactly what you might expect in a Sasquatch house. Sparse, well swept. One big bed made of interwoven branches, but with a suspiciously human looking quilt on it. A really big quilt.
There was also a kitchen area. Two large rocks coming out of the wall of the cave held a sturdy door and on this door were some basic cooking supplies and dishes. This seemed like a new development to me.
About then, I heard a sort of crackling sound and smelled a little whiff of ozone. Looking back outside I just caught a glimpse of a fading circle of red light, quite large. As it faded the person who had to be Ralph stepped through and appeared to solidify before my eyes. He made Ramona look like a kitten! His body was dark espresso brown, he had to be over eight feet tall. His shoulders were five feet across. Like his son, he had no neck to speak of. His arms almost reached his knees. But he was smiling! He also had a rather flat face and large brown eyes.
“Nikky, this is Ralph, he doesn’t bite,” she laughed. I must have looked overly impressed. “Ralph, this is Nikky. She was sent up here to find out if we are real!”
“Hey, Nikky! I’ve got a nice little clearing near here with some logs to sit on, why don’t we talk there?”, said Ralph!
There was another fireplace in the clearing and some conveniently laid logs, in a cozy circle.
Twigg ran around gathering some, um, twigs and sticks, enough for a small campfire. Ralph whipped out a Bic and lit it. He seemed to be wearing a small silver toned cross body bag. The firelight lit all three of their faces as they looked at me. Dreamlike imagery. Flickering light on those inscrutable large faces. I thought then of many deep pasts.
“So, are you content? Do we seem real to you Nikky,” asked Ralph.
“Well, Ralph, sir, that’s just the very point I was about to bring up, in a way. My client wants photos and maybe some video. He wants solid, human style, proof. At this point I know, of course, that you are as real as I am. But back down there in town my word will count for nothing! I would just be counted as another Squatch hunter coming out of the woods all wild eyed and crazy.”
“Aw, Nikky. That’s just not how it works. Our definition requires that we are unknown. We are a mystery. If you were to prove our existence it would change us forever. I don’t think we would cease to exist, but I can’t say what we would become. I just don’t know!
“It is your fate to know something that you cannot prove. There will always be that open spot in the world. An unknown quantity, as it were.”
I said, “I will accept that. It’s graceful. But will you tell me about those little rock towers on the path up here among the stones? Do they have meaning? Or are they merely pleasant to look at.”
His thunderous laughter filled the woods. “Those are stone cold jokes, Nikky! It’s hard to explain. We like to leave them for each other to find! When one of our people finds one, it just brightens their day!” I had the feeling that I had crossed some sort of line with that question and that he just wasn't going to tell me.
I sensed that the interview was coming to a close. I stood up.
“Thank you, both, for talking with me today. I will never forget you. Of that you may be sure. Your baby is adorable. I will find my way back down to my car, while there is still some daylight. Goodbye, truly,” I said.
I walked alone back down to where Elise was parked. I drove back out of the forest by way of the forest service road. Then I took the paved route back into town. The two-hour drive gave me lots of time to think. I reached a conclusion at last.
When I got home in the early evening, I sat down on the sofa next to where Richard was tending to his grooming and called Steve.
“Hi, Steve,” I started.
“Nikky! How did it go? Did you find her? What happened? How are you, anyhow?” He sounded pretty excited, for a client.
“Steve, I’m pooped. Really tired. I wandered all over the area where your students said they saw her, and I found nothing out of the ordinary. Nothing. It was a nice day in the woods. That’s all. I ate a bag of Dove chocolates and I have a sick stomach. Oink!”
“Well, damn. We had to try. I thought maybe she would come to you. How much do I owe you, Nikky?”
“Don’t be mad at your students Steve. We still don’t know for sure what they saw, or think they saw,” I said. “You don’t have to know anything about it at all.”
“Hey Steve, you don’t owe me anything. Why don’t you just take me to dinner tomorrow. I’m too tired tonight. Wait. No! Why don’t you come over here and I will make dinner tomorrow. How about that? Around six or so.”
Long silence. I could hear him thinking, I thought.
“Okay, Nikky. That sounds good. Very good. I’ll see you tomorrow at six!”
I smiled at Richard and messed up his fur, so he had to start again.
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