Willie's Take on Things

 

            Suzy was sleeping. She had nothing to say. It was too warm for saying anything.
            Toots was probably of the same opinion, and she hadn’t anything to say either.
            So, the officer present afloat was Willie, unless Sammie decided to chime in. Or Buddy, or Mr. Baby, or even the elusive Charley.
            Most of the time Willie ignored KittyComm™. He did his thinking with his eyes closed, not staring at some spooky dark window at some other cat’s apparition.
            So, I figured that I would just interview him…
 
            “What’s on your mind this muggy day, Willie, my very good boy?” I asked him.
            He got up close and whispered, “Those big noises outside.”
            “Are you talking about the explosions and colored twinklies four nights ago?” I asked. I wasn’t sure.
            “No, I knew that was coming. You were talking about it for days,” said Willie. “I had to assume that it was some sort of human ritual, so most likely safe enough, though weird.”
            “Then which other big noise are you talking about?”
            “OK. They sound like they are coming from the north, next door maybe? It’s a horrible squawking sound,” he confided nervously.
            “Mostly in the morning?” I said.
            He nodded. This is unusual. Cats don’t nod much.
            “Those are chickens,” I said. “Just big dumb walkin’ birds. They holler when they lay an egg in the morning! Willie, they’re just birds.”
            “Oh. And no one has killed them?” he said. He looked concerned.
            “No. They’re pets, just like you. I knew Suzy was a huntress, but you a potential hunter? That’s pretty funny Willie,” I said.
            “There is also some weird splashing. I can hear it when you use the screen door. And some hideous mad cries!” he continued. “It sounds like something choking on marbles! 

            "I’m a pet? Since when? I suppose those horrible cries are from pets too!”
            “In fact they are. Ducks. They’re ducks. They have a kiddy pool to play in. Water fowl,” I said.
            “I’ll bet the water’s foul,” he said. Making jokes like that is in the male union contract. Even cats know about the contract. Sigh.
            “Anything else on your mind, Willie,” I foolishly asked him.
            “Let me think,” he said, and his eyes closed slowly. Soon his breathing became deep and regular. Willie snores by the way. Cat snores are very funny!
            Ah, he’s such a good boy! Did I ever mention that? Well, he is, no matter what any of them say. It’s a matter of definition!
            But so much for interviewing him.

😹