A Tootsday Note From Ralph, Himself

 

Hey, Everybody!
            I just wanted you to know I'm thinking about you. Does that surprise you? It shouldn’t! I keep up to date.
            Special Tootsday greetings to the girl herself. Hey, Toots! Howzit going? I know you’re keeping an eye on things. If anything “Off” shows up, you’ll be the first to know! Then you’ll tell Suzy and the word will go out! Better tell LoneStar Neanderthal first though.
            Let’s see.. I want you guys to know that you have special dispensation to visit the Great Forest. I don’t give out many of these special dispensations! I hope you do come sometime. Just take highway 530 up to where it meets SR20 and hang a right. Park in that wide spot. Maeve will find you. Then she will find me and, yadda yadda! Let’s talk!
            I’m sorry to hear that Fred in Alaska had a bad time with the local Wild Men. It seems to be an armed camp up there. History, I guess. I’m sending my wishes for peace and understanding to everybody up there. It can be better.
            Greetings to the Domestic Predators! Ha ha! Cats. We have a couple of those here too, as you know.
            Ramona sends her love. Cherry is pretty shy, but she does too. She said she wishes you could see how big Blue is getting.
            Uncle Bob is standing here grinning.
 
With All My Best Wishes,
Ralph

💚🍃🌲🍁🌲🌿💚

Portrait made on my birthday!

A Night On Hat Island

 

            My parents and my two sisters were going to Yakima for some kind of Indigenous roundup and pow wow. Since I was 18 years old they gave me the choice of coming along like a kid or staying home. Of course I elected to stay home. I had an idea which I had be formulated for some time. I thought a nice free weekend without family would be just about the time I needed.
            At one time, my peeps, the Snohomish people had a village on Hat Island, a tiny spot of land out in Possession Sound between Everett and Whidbey Island. The village which was washed away by a tidal wave had been on the north end of the island. This was where I wanted to spend a night. I was curious as heck. I wondered if there was anything of them left there. I mean something intangible. Not ghosts, or anything silly. I just wondered if I could feel them after all this time.
            There is a little ferry that goes over there on weekends a few times.
            I gathered my gear on Friday after the family took off. I was loaded. I had a one man nylon tent, hotdogs, instant coffee, energy bars for breakfast, sugar, cup and a roll of paper towels, spare socks, and anything else I could think of that might come in handy. I had a modern flashlight too. I was not armed, unfortunately, but most of us aren’t carrying around here with the law the way it is. I had a good knife for utility purposes. Coat, hat, and high topped sneakers. I may have forgotten to list a few things here.
            Oh, my name is Bob Jones. An almost invisible name. It seems like I should have an Indian name, but my grandparents were long dead before I was born, and nobody was handing out Indian names to kids born in the 2000s.
            Thus prepared and loaded, I boarded the small passenger ferry at the Everett Yacht Club and took the short trip over to the island. Fewer than 30 people live there year round, but Hat Island does get visitors. Heck, I was one!
            It’s a short walk from the ferry dock to the north end of the island. It was still daylight; it’s early summer right now. The weather was warm, but felt like rain was coming. Clouds were starting to cover the sun. Well, that’s fine. We know about rain around here.
            I was pretty tickled that nobody knew where I was. I carry a phone like everybody else, in case of trouble. I didn’t expect trouble. Who does?
            By the time I got to the north end of the island the wind was kicking up. There were some white caps out on the water. I started looking around for a good camping spot. I thought I’d like to be on the sand, but up near the trees for cover from some of the wind and rain. I mean, if the storm that seemed to be coming did come.
            The place I liked was close to the forest but still down on the top of the beach. There were logs scattered around, very big logs. My spot was kind of down in a sandy dip between two of those logs which were high enough to provide some shelter. It just felt right. So, I popped the tent up there. I stuck my backpack just inside the opening, out of sight.
            A fire seemed like the next thing. There was smaller driftwood all over the beach. It was an easy job to haul a bunch of it up by my tent. It was starting to get dark, so I went ahead and made a good hot little fire on the sand. My lighter is one of the things I forgot to list up there at the top of this story. I lit a Camel. (Yeah, I know, Mom.)
            Then, I decided that it was dinner time. Hotdogs are easy. You don’t even need a pan. A stick will do. I ate three in a row and drank a bottle of chocolate milk. Didn’t list that either.
            It got dark and started raining a little. I checked my phone. No messages. I was feeling pretty good. I thought that yes, this would have been a good place for a village back then in those days. I did sort of sense a presence there, in a light way. Of course that could have been my imagination.
            What was not my imagination was a guy I saw down at the edge of the water. He was walking out of the Sound like he had been swimming out there. What the heck? I couldn’t see much about him, except that he was big. Real big, and he was heading straight for my fire. Maybe he wanted to get warm and dry off.
            I watched and waited, not knowing what kind of guy would be swimming out there at night. I thought about saying something, but the wind was loud and I didn’t know what to say.
            When this guy got to about 50 feet away and was approaching the firelight, I could see that he was not a regular guy. Of course, I knew about Sasquatch. You’d have to live in a cave not to know, right? This guy was 7 feet tall, covered in almost black hair, and must have weighed nearly 500 pounds. OK. What next? His move.
            He limped up to my fire and stood there dripping. I saw that he had a wound on his left foot.
            “You’re kidding,” I said reflexively. I think my mouth might have been hanging open.
            He smiled and shook his head. He held up both palms to me and then to the fire. So maybe he did want to warm up.
            Not knowing how to communicate, I just patted a spot on the sand near the fire. He sighed and took a seat. I had never been near such a large person before. Maybe he was hungry.
            “You hungry?” I said, not knowing what else to say.
            He nodded, and smiled again. So I demonstrated how to roast a dog on the fire and put it into a bun. I gave it to him. He took it delicately in between his right thumb and forefinger and ate it in two bites. Then he smiled again.
            I indicated with my hands that he could help himself. He was a fast learner. He roasted three more hotdogs and tucked them carefully into rolls and ate them quickly. So, I gave him my other bottle of chocolate milk, having demonstrated that you drink from the little bottle.
            I bet you thought this was going to be a scary story. Surprise!
            “Do you have a name?” I said after we had been just sitting by the fire for a while.
            He looked amused. Finally, he said, “Big.” I will never know what he thought I had asked him.
            The wind kept blowing, the rain got heavier. I put more wood on the fire once in a while. It was nice to have company, even if we couldn’t talk much. I noticed that the gash on his foot looked deep and painful.
            We were doing fine, but then something weird happened. The tide had come in, so that the water was closer to my campsite. Something was crawling out of the water. It was low and long, like 15 feet long. I pointed it out to Big. He frowned and stared. He jumped to his feet and started screaming. It just about blew me over. He grabbed my arm and pointed to his foot and then pointed down the beach at this slithering thing. I got the point pretty quick.
            Big grabbed a log and headed down the beach. I followed him. What I saw was horrifying. It could only be described as a Sea Monster. It had bulging eyes and vicious teeth, and it was hissing as it headed up the beach.
            Big hit him square on with the section of log he had armed himself with, then he started grabbing rocks and piling those in on the monster. I grabbed all the rocks I could find and threw them too.
            The beast kept hissing and trying to reach Big, but it was too late. Its body was broken.
            The monster died there on the beach while the wind blew white caps up on the waves and the rain beat down.
            Big dragged the dead thing down to the water of the Sound and threw it in. It floated there, barely showing in the dim light of the sky.
            We went back up to the fire. I piled on some more fuel, then we ate the energy bars. Big indicated that he would stay by the fire to sleep. I was beginning to think that I could hear him thinking. I crawled into my tent and went to sleep in my wet clothing.
            In the morning, the sun was shining from over the mountains to the east and Big was gone. I saw no sign of the dead monster out on the Sound. And when the Saturday morning run of the ferry came, I was on it. I sat there among the few other riders, squinting into the light and wondering what any of them would think of my story.
            The only person I told was my younger sister who knew how to keep her trap shut, and would believe me. She did, and she was sorry to have missed it herself.

👾

Toots & Suzy Make An Announcement

 

             In view of the fact that someone around here took Catfurday mostly off, and didn’t write anything, Toots and Suzy decided to create some content of their own! They were pretty excited about this and feeling just like a couple of real Content Creators!
            “Since our successful missions to the Mewn and then Mrrrz, we have decided to make it official,” said Toots.
            “Yes, everybody, Toots and I are here to announce our official, and perhaps startling, decision to make it our mission to explore further. To go where no cats have gone before, we are pretty sure!” said Suzy. “We’re not scared either!”
            “That’s right,” said Toots. “We finally got it through our Purrception™ that nothing can do anything to a Point of Vision. Hence, no fear! Meow!
            “The next thing was to name this thing, you know? Nameless missions are uncool. So we set to work yesterday, while all was quiet. We put our heads together, so to speak,” added Toots.
            “This is what we decided, after long consideration,” said Suzy.
 

Cat Vision Exploring the Mewniverse & Beyond

Or

⭐CVEM&B⭐

 
           
            “Pretty neat-o, huh,” said Toots! “We sure think so, and we hope you will look forward to our next Expurration™ of Space, Inner n’ Outer!”
            “We even have our own theme music picked out. After you listen with that in mind, we are sure it will set the mood nicely!” said Suzy.
 

“Behold!”

“Over and Meowt!”

Toots & Suzy

😻😹

Dreamy Old Ralph & The Unfinished Story

 

  

          When Ralph told Ramona about the strange dream, she was almost outraged, in a quiet way. Ramona is a very curious Firekeeper, and the unknowns in the story ate away at her sense of completion.
            She just looked at him for a while. Then, “How can you have a dream like that? The rest of the story must be there somewhere, Baby! Try to remember!”
            “Really. That’s all there was, Mona! I wish I knew too!” said Ralph. He didn’t mention what he had heard from his toe. He didn’t think it would translate well to Ramona. When he thought about it, he figured that the toe speech must have been a sort of dream too. It must have been. Toes don’t talk. They just get on with their work, which when analyzed, is pretty much what the dream toe told him, sending feedback from ground level.
            “But, Ralph Baby, what did the men expect to find in the box? It must have been some kind of treasure, right? Some woman must have fooled them somehow. But how did that happen?” said Ramona, urgently.
            “Yeah, not only were they angry when they saw the bones, they were terrified, and I’m not sure why? What’s so scary about an ancient box of old dead bones? And whose bones were they,” said Ralph. “I wonder if that small of a box must have held very small bones.”
            “Brrr!,” said Ramona. “See, there’s a story there, hiding.”
            “We don’t even know if it really happened, Mona. It might just be a crazy dream,” protested Ralph.
            Maeve had been listening carefully from her usual perch on Ralph’s left shoulder. She looked from person to person, thoughtfully.
            “I’ve heard a story like that,” she said. “I don’t even know if it’s true. My dear mate’s original family lived many day’s flight toward the sunrise in another deep and dark forest full of many tales.”
            “How does his story go?” said Ramona.
            “I will try to remember,” said Maeve. “But it has been a very long time since I spoke to him.”
            “That’s alright, Birdy,” said Ralph, reaching up to give  her a little pat on her black feathers.
            “It goes like this: One time there was a rich farmer. He saved all his earnings in cash. Never banks. He was afraid of banks.
            “He had an old wife, for he was old too, but they had no children to inherit this good farm. They also had three local men for farm workers.”
            “Did the farmer keep his money in that wooden box?” said Ramona.
            “That’s what Moshe* said he did,” said Maeve. “One day, he took most of his money, in the box, into the forest and buried it, marking the spot with river stones. He told his old wife where the box was buried, and then after a few years he died.”
            “But, in the dream there were only bones in the box, not money or any kind of treasure!” said Ramona.
            “In the story Moshe told me, the farmer made a false bottom in the box. The gold and bills were under the false bottom. For a joke the farmer piled a bunch of sheep’s bones on top of that fake bottom. Or maybe, he did it to scare anyone who found the box because they would think it was a burial,” said Maeve.
            “Why did the farm workers come to dig it up like sneaks at night?” said Ramona.
            “Oh you know. They were there to rob the old woman. She must have let slip that the box was buried under those rocks. Maybe she promised them something?
            “Maybe they threatened her to get her to tell where it was. Moshe didn’t know,” said Maeve. “But when they saw nothing but bones they were angry and felt that she had tricked them. He didn’t say what became of the box or the money after they had run away.”
            “In my dream, there was someone watching, a park ranger,” said Ralph. “I bet he came back the next day and investigated. I don’t think they were supposed to be doing sneaky stuff in the park at night.”
            “I wonder if the ranger was able to find out whose money it was and return it,” said Ramona.
            “In a proper story, he would have done that,” said Ralph. “But my dream didn’t go that far.”        
            “And Moshe didn’t know that part of the story, or he would have told me,” said Maeve.
            “I still think it’s strange how angry and frightened the men were,” said Ramona.
            “They probably thought the bones were human, and when they realized that they were being watched, thought that it was a burial and that they would get blamed for a death,” said Ralph. “But, you know, maybe it didn’t happen at all. It was just a dream.
            “Oh, Mona, wise and merciful Firekeeper, let’s let the dream fade away. Let’s take our Cherry up to the meadow. Now is a good time to visit Koba, the Star Child, and his caretakers as well! The day is warm and beautiful and full of pleasant whispers.
            “Who knows what wonderful and true things we will meet this day?”
            “Oh, Baby! You’re right! We have better things to think about!” said Ramona. “I miss that child so much already that my heart hurts for him!”
            “Evermore!” said Maeve as she lifted off, soaring into the middle of the glorious air.
            So, like truly heroic characters in all the best tales, the group of four set out for the meadow immediately.
            Maeve flew overhead. Cherry drifted along beside her parents. Ralph and Ramona held hands as they walked. When they came out into the open all eyes could see the leafy dome of the Alder Tree House and in their eagerness, no one gave the old dream a single thought. It was quite forgotten.

🍀

 
*Moshe was Maeve’s old mate's name.

Time is Purrception™

 

            House cats don’t have a lot of chores. It leaves them lots of time for intellectual pursuits. This explains a lot concerning Suzy and Toots. The truth of the matter is that those two can get pretty far afield, out there, in a word, or two words.
            One day recently both of them found themselves with time on their paws..
            One thing led to another and soon they were chatting about their recent foray into space; travel to the Mewn.
            “It was great!” said Toots, “Though we did  have to leave suddenly!”
            “That thing saw us, Toots,” mrrred Suzy.
            “Oh, really? We weren’t even there, just our Purrception was there! Don’t be so scairdy, Suzy!” continued Toots. “Nothing can getcha when you’re just a point of vision flying free!”
            “Then why were you in such a hurry to leave?” said Suzy.
            “Purely instinct, I didn’t have time to think it through,” said Toots. 
            “Time!” said Suzy. “What is time?”
            “Hm. Nobody knows that, Suzy. Personally I think it might be a way of looking at things, depending on where you are,” said Toots, confusingly.
            “Oh, ho, Toots! So, it’s all a matter of Purrception?” giggled Suzy.
            “I daresay that everything we notice is a matter of Purrception,” said Toots. “How about a trip to Mrrrz next?”
            “Where?” said Suzy, Cautiously.
            “You know, the Red Planet. People think they are going to go build cities on Mrrrz. I bet there are already cities there. Maybe underground, but we could check. We might be the first persons to know!” said Toots. “We should be famous already for seeing those towers on the back of the mewn. But nobody listens to cats!”
            “Um, when? Do we have time?” said Suzy.
            “If we want to, we have time,” suggested Toots.
            “Well, OK. Now?” Suzy asked her friend. “Well, let’s do it, Toots. Now!”
            Each girl closed her eyes and concentrated on her awareness. First they synced up. That was easy. They had done it many times before.
            “You know, Toots, there are a lot of places on Earth we haven’t seen,” said Suzy. “Still wanna go to Mrrrz?”
            “There is world enough and time for both,” said Toots. “Let’s go!” 
            In no time Toots and Suzy’s Purrception was cruising over the surface of Mrrrz. They wanted to see well, so they were only like a hundred feet above the surface. They had to slow down because at first they were going too fast to see anything.
            “Wow, Toots, it doesn’t look like anybody lives here,” said Suzy looking over the rough desert of the surface of the planet. “I don’t see a single plant or any living thing. I wonder if it’s as dead as it looks.”
            “Wait a minute,” said Toots. “Aren’t those hatches scattered here and there? Like big doors set into the ground?”
            “They almost look like craters, but I think you’re right. The craters don’t have a split in the middle!” said Suzy. “They must be doors! Shall we peek inside?”
            “Are we not cats? Of course we shall,” said Toots. “How about this one, my dear?”
            As soon as they wished it they found themselves in a dark place behind one of those hatches. After a few moments, they could see better, because they wished it so.
            “It’s an airlock!” said Toots. “The city is on the other side of the second door!”
            Soon the girls were on the other side of that inner door too.
            There was a long tunnel leading down into a lighted area. A creature was walking toward them. They could hardly believe their “eyes.” It looked more like a crab than anything they had ever seen before. It moved with purpose, like it was coming right to them. Could it have sensed the intrusion somehow? It was blue, by the way, walked on two larger limbs on its bottom part, but sported 6 others, arranged around the main body part. It had eyes on stalks like a regular crab, but it looked disturbingly aware.
            The girls began to feel very Cautious™, indeed!
            “Toots, I think our work here is done!” messaged Suzy in a panic.
            “I believe you’re right! We’ve proved our point, to ourselves, if no one else!” agreed Toots. “Let’s get out of here! I’ve seen enough of Mrrrz, and I bet you have too!”
            “Amen, Sister!” said Suzy.
            In no time at all Toots was back in her cozy little bed, snoozing with Sammie, and Suzy was asleep in the green chair in front of the gas heater. Perhaps they had only dreamed, but for sure, their warm sleeping spots are the best place for them!

🦀

Purrsday is for Purring™

 🤍

Zonked and purring up a storm at the same time!

🌸

            One of the cutest things I’ve noticed about having the new kits, is that if they are disturbed while sleeping, or getting into something, their first reaction is loud purring.

            I just went in to where Booker was sleeping and talked with him and petted him a little, and right on cue, loud purring! OTOH, when I have to remove one of them from some situation, I get the same result. Lots of purring.

            What does it mean? For one thing they purr much more than the other cats ever did. Hm.

            At the bottom of it, I wonder if it’s not just a bonding thing, like we’re all together in this, whatever it is. Solidarity!

            Maybe it means, for one thing, that these kittens have never had a bad experience in their lives. They’re just genuinely happy boys?

            I know cats purr if they feel sick sometimes.

            I’ve knew a cat who would purr against me if I cried.

            Some have been known to purr with an injured or ill person.

            It think it can have an element of petition, “Let me down, I’ll purr nicely.”

            Of course I think of it as love and happiness expressed in a cat way.

 

            It’s a strange thing to wake in the dark in the middle of the night and to hear loud purring somewhere nearby. Very soothing and peaceful. Maybe someone, some little soul, in the house at night is Purring™ for us all!

            I think that’s true.

🤍

The Meditations of a 7th Toe

   

         

           So, anyhow, Ralph and Uncle Bob went fairly far afield rounding up some dry deadfall for the girls to cook with. Dry is best of course because it burns hotter, though green wood is far better than no wood. On the way back to the Meadow and the Home Clearing they encountered a flock of hen turkeys. Ralph kind of crooned at them, which made them easy to catch, and their numbers were decreased by four. A pretty good day of hunting, since they had not really been hunting at all.
            Ralph carried the firewood in his big leather backpack and his turkeys by hand. Uncle Bob had to make do with his hands. He had a tough time, but they finally got him home to Suzie.
            Ralph delivered the fuel and the turkeys to Ramona, kissed her and hugged Cherry.
            By now it was late afternoon, not that Forest Giants care about the time of day, so, he decided to go pick up where he left off that morning when Uncle Bob showed up.
            It was a nice mild, gray day without rain. It was quiet in the forest. Sound seemed hushed. He didn’t even hear the river talking to itself. Maeve was down chatting with Ramona and teaching Cherry Raven folklore. It was such a nice comfy day. His log beckoned.
            “Now,” thought Ralph. “I was just waiting to hear from my 7^th toe when I got interrupted.” Soon he was in sleep’s antechamber.
            “If you read from left to right, as most do in this fair country, I myself dwelt on your right foot, Sir. My position is subsidiary. I am next to your Most Auspicious Great Toe, on your right foot. A goodly position, Sir, as you commonly stride out first with your right foot!” said No. 7.
            Ralph’s eyes opened briefly, but then they drifted shut again.
            “I see life at a fundamental level, dear Sir. I am nearly the least of your servants, but not quite the least. We toes, in fact, read the earth you stride on. We send subtle messages up to you. ‘Lightly here!’ and ‘There are thorns here!’ and such. We toes are on your side, um, in a manner of speaking. We live to serve, and when you prosper, indeed we toes prosper in like manner.”
            By then, Ralph was well and truly in sleep’s throne room. And a vision came to him.
            He saw in his mind’s eye that he was in another great forest far away to the east. He gazed upon a clearing among a stand of mighty trees, foreign to the Douglas firs of his own home. Soon, three rough fellows came pacing in carrying shovels and strong flashlights, for it was nighttime there.
            They were looking all around for something. One said to the other two, “She said it was marked by a flat black rock, round from a river.”
            “By now, it will be buried,” said another one.
            “Keep stomping and kicking, it will be the only river rock out here,” said No. 1.
            They did this until at last No.2 ran his toe into something under a layer of forest duff.
            “That’s it!” said No. 3, the youngest of the crew, visibly excited.
            It seemed to Ralph that he was looking through another’s eyes. Human eyes. The man whose vision he saw had authority, but not enough power to enforce it. He was afraid of the odds against him. This young man represented law, but could not afford to challenge these diggers. He watched.
            No. 1 poked his fingers under the edge of the flat black river rock and rolled it aside. The flashlight beams danced all over the clearing. All three men set the lights around the area where the stone had been so that they could see to dig. And dig they did. Frantically, hungrily, quickly.
            Soon they had a pretty good sized hole. The watcher watched and stayed hidden. He wanted to know what was in the hole, if anything at all.
            About three feet down, a shovel hit something that made a dull thud, perhaps a wooden object. It seemed to Ralph that it must be a chest of some sort. Anyone would assume so.
            The three men dug all around it. But they were tiring. They rubbed their hands on their old pants, spat, cursed and dug again. They got their shovel blades under the bottom of the object, which did seem to be a wooden box, much deteriorated. It wasn’t very big, maybe two feet long and 18 inches high and a similar measurement deep.
            It was drawn up out of the hole. It was locked, but the wood was rotted around the lock, so they struck the box until the lid could be lifted.
            No. 1 lifted the lid and turned it back. The hinges broke and it fell away.
            “That bitch!” he screamed. He kicked the box over and over. Nothing fell out but bones.
            The watcher gasped. Then he ran. He had seen their faces well and he knew them. It seemed to Ralph that the young officer raced to save his own life, and in hopes to discover a mystery. He was in much better condition than his pursuers, and he ran well, leaving them far behind in the depths of the forest…
            Ralph woke suddenly. He shook his head in amazement. “Wow!” he said to the air around him where he lay. He sat up blinking for a few seconds.
            But, he could smell roasting turkey, and suddenly all was well again, and the dream drifted off to wherever dreams go and was forgotten.

🏴‍☠️

"Hey, Ralphie!"

 

            One fine morning Ralph was stretched out on his dear old cedar log. He was sensing each toe separately as a sort of meditation. He had gotten to the 7^th toe, and it was just about to spill some toe secrets about its life as a toe, when a familiar voice interrupted his pre-nap considerations.
            It was Uncle Bob.
            “Hey, Ralphie,” he said. “What’cha doin’?”  Bob’s friendly face looked down at Ralph’s startled one.
            “Um, thinking. What’s up, Bob,” said Ralph, rising to a sitting position, because he knew this wasn’t going to be a quickie. It never was. He mentally kissed his nap goodbye.
            “Have a seat, Bob, and let’s hear it, whatever it is,” said Ralph.
            Uncle Bob swarmed aboard Ralph’s log, but ended up facing the other way and had to turn around to talk. It took a minute.
            “I just remembered something! Usually I can’t remember anything that happened back after we grew up and I was still smoking so much. Did I ever tell you about the guy in the green truck I met one day?” said Bob. “He was a really nice guy!”
            “I don’t remember hearing about the guy in the green truck, Bob,” said Ralph. “What happened?”
            “All I remember is that I was lying on the ground by a road. My eyes were open and I was looking up at the sky wondering if it was gong to rain. I guess I was really close to the road because I heard a car or truck slow down like they were taking a look. And I was really worried that a human was looking at me laying in the grass by the road,” said Uncle Bob.
            “What happened then, did someone see you?” asked Ralph, to help the story along.
            “I guess he parked. The engine stopped running. I heard him get out of the truck. I peeked. It was an old green truck with a truck box thing on the back. Then I shut my eyes so maybe he would leave me alone!” said Bob, eyes wide.
            “Did it work?” said Ralph.
            “No, Ralphie! He came right up to me and said, ‘Are you alive?’ I sneezed. So, I guess he figured out I was alive. He said, ‘Why are you laying there by the ditch? You look dead. What’s the matter with you?’
            “It was freakier than heck, Ralphie. He wasn’t scared of me at all. He was just this dad looking guy in jeans and a white t-shirt. I wasn’t scared of him either I guess, so I got up.”
            “He said, ‘You look like hell. Are you hungry, or what?’ When he said that he smiled and I was really hungry. He guessed that right. I didn’t remember eating for a long time.”
            “He said he had a sack of groceries in the truck and why didn’t I come with him? I was so scared, Ralphie, but I was really hungry. So, I got into the truck. It was like a dream. There I was in a human’s truck!” whispered Uncle Bob.
            “Wow, Bob. You amaze me!” said Ralph. “Then what?”
            “He started up the engine and got back up on the road and drove down to a little dirt road. He turned in there, then turned the truck around so he was facing out. He parked again. He gave me some coffee out of a can thing with a lid. I didn’t know it was coffee back then, It was hot and brown and bitter, but I drank it anyhow. Then he gave me a banana. He had to show me how to peel it.
            “He laughed at me, but not mean. Then he gave me some kind of slices of meat put into bread. Then he opened up a paper bag of little things like sweet bread, I didn’t know about cookies back then. ‘Feel better, kid?’ he said, and I did. I ate all the cookies.”
            “You know, Bob. You were awful lucky he found you! You know that? It could have really gone wrong. Passed out on the road like that?” said Ralph. “Some fool might have freaked out and shot you!”
            “I know, Ralphie. I think he pretty much saved me,” said Uncle Bob.
            “How did you manage to understand each other?” said Ralph.
            “I don’t remember talking, but I understood what he said. Maybe it was that head thing? I don’t really know,” said Bob.
            “What’s the end of the story? I’m really curious,” said Ralph.
            “Not much. He gave me a bag of orange roots, or carrots. I didn’t know what they were. He told me to knock off whatever made me lay by the road looking dead. He showed me how the door handle worked and I got out. I said my thanks in our language, he nodded. I shut the truck door and watched him drive back out to the paved road. That’s all,” Bob said.
            “That was an unusual human,” mused Ralph.
            “It’s funny I forgot about him for so long,” said Uncle Bob.
            “He was right, wasn’t he?” said Ralph, giving Uncle Bob a sideways look.
            “Yeah. He was like somebody’s dad,” said Uncle Bob.
            “Funny it took you so long to get the message,” said Ralph.
            “But I did, Ralphie! I did! I really like having memories!”
            “Ah, Bob. Yes you did! Let’s go get some firewood for Ramona and Suzie. Make ourselves useful, eh?” said Ralph.
            “Good idea,” said Uncle Bob.

🍌

A True Tale of Terror on The 405 Freeway!

 

            It would be very easy to blame my dear little commie sister for this, but in truth I am responsible for going along with the gag myself. I should have known it was too weird.
            It goes like this: One day, several years ago, my sister called me on the phone with a request. It seems that a woman had come to her door begging for help. The odd lady said that she was stuck here in Everett without funds and needed to get to Redmond, IIRC. She was at her wit’s end, she said. She begged Chris for a ride! She knocked on the right door.
            That’s a pretty good distance from Everett, through savage traffic. Apparently, sister didn’t have access to a vehicle that day. So, she called me and asked me to drive her and this dame, I shall call Sylvia, to Redmond. No specific location in Redmond was mentioned.
            Any sensible person would have said, "Nah, too flakey." Maybe I was curious. I don’t know why I did it, but I said OK and drove over to Chris’ house and picked her and Sylvia up. Sylvia was a small scrappy looking critter in her 50s maybe. She sat in the back seat looking oddly happy and not talking much. Pretty darn "Off!"
            I was beginning to get the idea that this project was real dumb.
            I asked Sylvia where she wanted to go, that she was in such a hurry to get to.
            We were on 405. There is a big hospital in Kirkland on 405 called Evergreen. Sylvia said she had an appointment in the hospital. OK. So we parked outside the hospital and went in. Sylvia went ahead of us way down the hall. So, I turned to Chris and said, “Let’s beat it. Leave her here!” Chris agreed and we turned around to leave. But the wily bag lady twigged and came running to go with us. I should have just told her “No” right then, but I failed.
            She wasn’t done yet. She wanted to go to a certain address on Mercer Island, a ritzy neighborhood, by the way. She gave me an address, and I tried to find it. We had cell phones back then, but it was like a Nokia brick. There was no way of locating obscure addresses.
            This went on for a while. Sylvia looked happy as heck. She was loving riding around in the back seat. It became late afternoon. I was getting pretty tired of this game and Chris looked pretty embarrassed.
            So, I parked. I called 911, I really did this. I told the nice girl on the line my problem. I had this woman in the car who was looking for this address and could they provide some direction. She said, “Stay right there! We’ll send an officer.” Lol!! And they did.
            When the guy got to us, he collected Sylvia, who looked like all her fun was done now. It turned out that they knew her! She had done this before!
            I have no idea what the Mercer Island police do with strange vagrant ladies. But, thank goodness it wasn’t my problem anymore!
            I think I have left out a few other stages of this game of Sylvia’s. It took all day.
            So, OK, it wasn’t really terrifying. It was just stupid. I went along with my gullible sister’s desire to help a female beggar at her door.
            What would you have done, if your sister called with a request like that?

❓

Let's Just Talk, And Maybe Share A Snack.

 

Sweetie and Suzy share a snack cup quite nicely!

The most open thread there ever was!
Good morning, everyone!

Happy Suzday!

 

🤍

A Chance Meeting in An Unusual Place

 

            Once upon a time, before our time, when the world was much newer, there was a mighty Walker. We may call him Nimson. In the years of his strength he was said, by those who chatter, to be 12 cubits tall. This is a bit of a mystery, but mystery is good for the soul, is it not? It begets humility sometimes.
            This Nimson was an observant and reflective fellow. He spoke little. He watched carefully.
            He had observed several tribes of man, those who live no longer, and also those who have survived until the present day. He had judged them, from afar, to be difficult, restless, and quarrelsome, but also instructive to observe.
            Once this mighty Walker was out doing a bit of hunting, he used a spear by the way. He passed through the forest of his home, relishing the beauty of the tall trees, listening to the songs of the birds, gazing rapt at flowers, feeling the wind moving over the earth. He was so enchanted by it all that he walked on further than usual until the trees gave way to grasslands. He stood for a moment, judging whether to go further into unfamiliar territory, but finally told himself, “Yes, it is good.” So on he went. The grasslands spread out before him, mysterious, and open to the sky.
            There were no trails there, just the endless grass waving languidly in the wind. It was almost hypnotic. Nimson walked on wondering what sort of prey might live in this tall endless grass.
            At last he noticed that though the land appeared to be flat, it was not utterly flat. There were dips and hollows which appeared suddenly when he came upon them. Some had springs of water birthing small streams that wandered off to the next low spot. He was charmed. He stopped and lapped the water, then walked on.
            Night came, and with it a brilliant full moon. He was getting hungry.
            The wind brought Nimson the smell of some kind of smoke. It wasn’t just wood smoke. There was something else in the scent. Something about this scent interested him. It beckoned.
            Then he saw firelight. Realizing that it must be a campsite, he drew silently near.
            There, in the glow of the flames, he saw a woman of the tribe of modern man. She wore a straight garment of tanned leather and long dark hair hung about her shoulders. It was not apparent whether she be mother or maiden. She was alone except for a horse, tied to a bush nearby. This small horse happened to be covered in bundles and such.
            Over the fire, she had laid a large round thing like a shield, he thought. Upon its surface were laid pieces of meat, the source of the strangely scented smoke. Nimson had eaten boars, so he knew pork when he smelled it, but this was more than just pork, there was something different about it.
            He wasn’t afraid of her. He feared nothing. And he was curious.
            Nimson stepped out into the firelight. Before her eyes he stood there impossibly tall, clothed in his own covering of jet black hair, with a face like a man’s, but different somehow. He had amber colored eyes and an inquisitive expression.
            She took him in with a quick glance and then smiled up at him.
            “Are you hungry, Warrior?” she smiled her coyote smile.
            “Perhaps I am, Woman,” he answered, noting the smile.
            “I have meat here, Warrior. Honied, spiced, and smoked boar’s flesh. Will you eat?” said she.
            “I have never eaten meat touched by fire, Woman,” said Nimson. “It smells very good.”
            “Sit, and I will serve you,” she said, edging close and gazing boldly up into his face.
            Nimson sat on the trampled grass near the fire. The woman fished some pieces of meat off of the metal object, laid them on a flat wooden vessel of some sort and then she laid the plate, for of course it was a plate, near him where he sat cross-legged on the trampled grass.
            “Warrior, if you will come with me and be my love, and live among my people, you shall have meat such as this every day. Together with you, I will rule over the lives of men and women, for you are very powerful!” said the dark haired woman with intense, shining eyes of pale blue.
            Nimson laughed and rose to his feet once more, without touching the cooked meat waiting for him on the wooden plate on the grass.
            Fasting, he left her there, walking back into the moonlit tall grass, following his own trail toward his home in the forest. He stopped at the spring again and drank.
            He stood then, wiped the excess water off of his face, looked up at the moon, tucked his spear under his left arm and walked again.
            Once, as he walked, he snorted derisively.

🍎

F'lineday Lazy Open Thread for April 10!

 

            Most of what goes on around here lately looks a lot like this. The little creatures are growing quickly. They are still the kindest, most affectionate kittens I have ever met. Still amazed.

            The one on top of Dad's old piano is Sweetie. He is well named. He is the most involved and the most playful. He gets into the most mischief too.

            The one in the window, stretching his long stripy legs, is Booker. He is more observant and less likely to be the first to start something. He sleeps more. He is the one who is often in my chair before I can get to it.

            Anyhow, I didn't get around to writing anything yesterday. 

            It's always a pleasure to read anything you care to write! As always, feel free to opine!

🌸

A Sweet Homecoming

 

            

            Twigg’s first thought on the morning of their first day home, before he had opened his eyes, was that the sun must be up because he heard humming from outside of the Alder Tree House. He smiled. Then memory flooded back.
            “Oh!” He sat up suddenly. There was Leely, nestled in with Koba, beside him. They slept on. The humming beckoned him to come outside. So, he carefully laid aside the wonderful quilt made by Mak’s palace seamstresses, and being careful to move silently, he opened the door and stepped out into the morning.
            Tears filled Twigg’s sweet eyes. He was so glad to be back in the meadow, the same meadow where he and Marge had met, part of the Great Forest of his home. But, he was smiling too because he was surrounded by hundreds of B’s all buzzing their jubilant greetings.
            “Morning blessings, B’s,” he called in the Old Language of the forest.
            The dew was just drying off of the grass and fireweed blossom, and blackberry blooms. An entrancing scent filled the air, the scent of summer in the Great Forest. Twigg breathed deeply, and sighed. He looked at the sky; there were no clouds. It would be a hot day. The sun was just peeking through the tops of the Douglas firs.
            A breath of wind came to pay a quick visit with the prince of the forest. Twigg raised his arms to acknowledge its passing. Content, the wind passed on.
            He wandered out into the deep grass, found a stand of fireweed, being worked by the B’s, apologized for disturbing their labors, and picked one of the stalks. It was the very spirit of summer in the meadow.
             He was heading back to Leely when he saw the red door open. There stood Leely with Koba in her arms.
            “Morning blessing, Dear Love,” Leely said in correct Saslingua. It came easily to her, and she was picking up a bit of it in passing. She wore a simple dress made of a fabric quite like cotton by the palace seamstresses. It was grassy green and unornamented. Her dark hair hung long around her shoulders. She smiled.
            “I bless thee,” he returned, likewise, then grinned. “Look, Leely, we’re home. They don’t have fireweed on Ord, do they?”    
            “I didn’t see any,” she said. She took the stalk of pink flowers, and handed Koba to his father. The child woke then and looked around at his mother and father, and the world all around him. Of course, he didn’t speak yet, but he never cried either. He was just old enough to hold his head up and focus well on his surroundings. Koba smiled.
            “What shall we do today?” asked Leely.
            “My father will come later, and we will go fishing or maybe hunting. There are no palace cooks for us here, my love,” said Twigg.
            “There are some nice things left from yesterday’s feast. We should eat,” said Leely.
            Their breakfast was made of rolls of rich bread, a sort of butter, berries, and a cup of that very light bubbly wine. All the fruits or Ord, Mak’s home planet.
            As they sat inside the Alder Tree House with the door left open so they could see the meadow outside, Leely said, “I’m so thankful to be back, Twigg. It was an adventure like no other, but I am eager to be truly your Fire Keeper.”
            “And so you shall,” said Twigg. “For you do all things well, and are full of wisdom.”
            Leely blushed, because praise was new to her.
            They took Koba out for a tour around the meadow, showing him each flower, each bush, and the Gifting Stump, until he was tired and needed to go back for a nap.
            Later in the morning, Ralph appeared accompanied by Bob and Berry. He carried a bag.
            Ralph stepped inside to see Leely and Koba, who was still sleeping in his little basket bed.
            “Shall we go fishing?” Ralph asked his son. “Ramona likes trout, even more than turkey or venison. Maybe Leely would like some trout too.”
            “Of course she would,” agreed Twigg.
            “Yes, I would!” said Leely.
            Berry and Bob were so happy to see their old playmate, that they head butted him over and over. They smiled their secret cat smiles, and their golden eyes glowed happily.
            When Ralph and Twigg had set off together, Leely was just considering whether she should take Koba to visit Ramona, when that lady, and Cherry, came to see them instead.
            Ralph and Twigg remembered to fetch some firewood for Leely, so that she could actually cook. Ralph, Ramona, and Cherry stayed for dinner.
            All in all, it was a perfect first day home.

🤍🌿🤍

A Trip to The MEWN!

 

            The girls had been hearing a lot of talk lately about an important trip to the “moon.” So naturally they were very excited. Toots had the great idea first, but then, Suzy agreed immediately!
            “Hey, Suz!” Toots sent, “Let’s go to the MEWN! D’ya wanna? I sure do!”
            “Can we do that?” asked Suzy, dubiously.
            “Sure! NASA did it, didn’t they? So, we can just as well!” said Toots, jubilantly.
            “How will we do it?” said Suzy.
            “We’ll just be points of vision, Suz! Like always! The same way we do everything else!” said Toots.
            “OK! That doesn’t sound too scary. Nothing bad can happen to a point of vision, right?” said Suzy.
            “Purrfectly safe! But let’s skip the flying TO the MEWN part, ‘cuz that’s boring! Let’s just do the MEWN part! OK?” said Toots. “I bet it wouldn’t take us four or five days to get there, but still, boring!”
            “I’m ready!” said Suzy.
            “Now, concentrate, Suzy, as hard as you can! We can do this! Let’s just Be There Now!” purred Toots.
            There was a five second pause.
            “Shall we do a countdown?” said Suzy.
            “Nah! We’re already there! Look! What do you see, Suz?” said Toots, in total awe.
            “I see bright light! Craters and mountains! The MEWN is silver, Toots!” said Suzy. “Ow, my eyes! It’s so bright out here!”
            “OK! Let’s go around to the dark side! How about it?” whispered Toots.
            In just a few seconds, the girls were over the back of the MEWN. No cat had ever been there before!
            “Toots, it’s so dark! I can’t see anything!” said Suzy.
            “Well, give your point of vision a minute to adjust to the dark, Suzy,” said Toots. “It won’t take long!”
            “Oh, you’re right,” said Suzy. “I see more craters and mountains! Wait! Do you see that thing there? Oh my, there are lots of them! Toots, what are those things? Did we discover something?”
            “We did, Suzy! Those look like towers of some kind! We need to tell the world about this! There are towers hiding on the back of the MEWN!” said Toots.
            “I wonder if anybody is home?” said Suzy. “Maybe we should check, before we go telling the world?”
            “Oh, yes! Let’s get in closer. Maybe someone is there!” said Toots.
            “I don’t see how anyone could live here. There’s no air,” said Suzy.
            “Maybe they make air in those towers?” said Toots.
            There was another pause as the girls adjusted their viewpoints to ground level.
            “These are funny buildings. They look like they grew here,” said Suzy.
            “They look like they are made of MEWN dust,” said Toots.
            “I wonder how they did that?” wondered Suzy. “I also wonder where the people who made them are!”
            “Maybe we can’t see them,” said Toots. “Maybe they are watching us right now!”
            Just then a vivid red sphere of light appeared outside the first floor of the tower. It seemed to search around as if it sensed a foreign presence in the area. At last, it steadied and slowly approached the girls’ location.
            “There’s no place like home!” yowled Suzy, in a rush.
            “Take me home, country road!” sang Toots!
 
            And just like that, Toots and Suzy were back in their respective homes. Safe and dry! Toots was at her window station. Suzy was down under the old piano bench.
            “Wow, Toots!” said Suzy.
            “Far OUT!” said Toots!
            Far overhead, the MEWN smiled down on the intrepid girls, and all was well.

🌒😹😻🌔