At Lou's Pizza Palace

 

            “Robby, get up! Why are you sitting on the ground?” demanded Mitch, who was sitting on the earth himself, but didn’t seem to realize it.
            “Sure, Mitch,” said Robby. “I’m trying to see if I have everything here.” He sort of patted his pockets and looked vaguely around himself as if seeking an answer of some kind.
            Mitch looked at the camera in his hand.
            “Here, put this away,” said Mitch. “Help me up will you?”
            Robby stashed the camera in its special pouch in their Research Kit™ and scrambled to  his feet. Mitch stuck out a hand and Robby pulled it, and Mitch managed to get to his feet, then stood there dusting off his jeans for minute.
            “Sure. Pizza sounds good. I could eat anything right about now!” said Mitch, returning to the subject at hand.
            “Whose idea was this place anyhow, Robby? Let’s go. I don’t think there is a BigFoot anywhere within fifty miles,” grumbled Mitch.
            So faithful Robby followed Mitch back out of the forest, to the dumpster and the parking lot, where they reversed maneuvers and climbed into the old Land Cruiser.
            Lou’s Pizza Palace was owned nowadays by Tony, Lou’s son in law, but it was still called Lou’s in downtown Darrington, WA.
            Mitch should have know better than to eat at Lou’s, but he was very hungry. Robby didn’t object either. They’d never been there before, either on of them. But pizza is pizza so in they went. It was on old one story building painted red, with white multi-paned windows on both sides of the door.
            It was dim inside, but not truly dark, with a candle lit in a jug on each of about ten tables made of maple with matching maple chairs. Each table sported a red and white checked vinyl tablecloth. There were woodsy looking characters sitting at three of the tables. It didn’t seem like a place for women, or women just didn’t like their pizza maybe.
            When Mitch and Robby stepped into the room all heads swiveled to take a good long look at the strangers. There was some laughter, and then most of the heads swiveled back to keep eating and talking. One guy kept looking, but he didn’t say anything. He was at a table by himself and didn’t look like a logger.
            “Mitch, it’s 6 o’clock,” said Robby who was staring at his phone. “When did we get to the Ranger Station?”
            “Around noon, maybe some later? Driving takes time too, you know,” said Mitch.
            “I know, but it should be about 4,” said Robby.
            A waitress came out of the kitchen and plopped down in a chair next to Robby. She wore jeans and a blue t-shirt and had long brown braids. She looked about 50, and a bit tired, hence the seated approach.
            “Do you guys know what you want,” said this lady, whose name turned out to be Evelyn.
            Mitch scanned to menu on the table and ordered Lou’s Timber Topper without consulting Robby, and two beers. They had Coors.
            Evelyn wrote it down, then she took a moment to look at Mitch and Robby.
            “You guys look a little out of place,” she said. “Do you mind if I sit for minute and you can tell me what’s up gentlemen? What are a couple of scholarly looking dudes like you doing in Darrington?”
            “Um. We were doing some investigating up by the Ranger Station. It amounted to nothing, but Robby here thinks we are missing some time,” said Mitch.
            “I’ll give this order to the kitchen, then I’ll come back with the beer. Hang on,” said Evelyn. In five minutes, she was back with the beer.
            “Missing time is a serious matter,” said Evelyn. “Don’t you know what that means?”
            “What does it mean?” whispered Robby, wide eyed again.
            “It means that you’ve probably been abducted. Do you have any new injuries, like punctures or anything?
            “What were you investigating anyhow? You can tell me. I know everything and I say damn near nothing,” averred Evelyn looking all motherly and sweet. She went to the kitchen and got the Timber Topper and a couple of plates and came back.
            The Timber Topper was about 20inches across and contained just about everything found on a normal pizza, minus weird stuff like pineapple. It was a doozy. They dug in, hungry as they were.
            “Lady,” said Mitch, after a few bites, “Do you know anything about BigFoot?”
            “Shhh. You don’t want those guys over there to hear you,” she said. “The least they will do is laugh at you if they think you are snooping around the woods looking for BigFoot. They don’t like guys that look like you two anyhow, even without BigFoot.”
            “Abducted by who,” said Robby. “I might have a little scratch here that I don’t remember having.”
            Evelyn stood up, made a weird little gesture like something spinning up in air over her head, and tapped her temple as if to say, "Think about it," and said, “Shhhh,” again. Then she disappeared into the kitchen.
            “What did she mean by that, Mitch,” said Robby.
            “UFO’s maybe. Not sure. I think she might be nuts,” said Mitch. “I don’t think we got abducted by anything or even lost any time. Maybe you’re nuts too, Robby. Driving around can use up a lot of hours,” insisted Mitch.
            Robby kept eating pizza and drinking beer right along with Mitch, but he wasn’t happy. Something wasn’t adding up right, but he saw that discussing it with Mitch wasn’t going to get him anything.
            Ranger Rick, who had been listening to the whole proceeding, looked down at the table and smiled. He had a pretty good idea where the missing time had gone, and who had disappeared it.

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