Mikkel wanted that coin crown. He
wanted it real bad. But it was in the bottom of Ralph’s river. It niggled at
him. This would require careful planning Mikkel thought.
While Mikkel thought, (plotted), he watched Wolvrin Farsukkil mop the throne room. What could have been more obvious. You lose the crown, you ain’t the king! The irony was delicious to Mikkel, but he didn’t really have time to savor it. He had to figure a way to beat the song of No Return, and return actually to get what was rightfully his, as was his belief.
He knew there must be a way. But what was it? In the meantime, he had to make his own kingship stick. The crown would seal the deal. He craved compliant obedience from the herd of Plaidies, not grudging and sullen acquiescence.
Now, in the world of the Plaidies, wherever that is, there was a Mother of Plaidies. She wore no crown, because she didn’t need one. Her power was uncontested. It seemed like she had always been there and that she would never die. None of them knew how old she was, or who had begat her on whom.
Mikkel Mooch, the king, decided to seek the counsel of the Mother. He knew she wasn’t all that invested in Wolvrin, and that she would likely help him break the song that kept him underground in the Plaidie throne room.
Many believed that the throne room was located in a hollow under Glacier Peak. Anything is possible! Sure, the Plaidies are faery folk, but they are a very localized PNW variety.
The Mother had her own separate quarters far from the throne room. She was not often visited there. She didn’t like idiots, and it was risky visiting her with some knuckleheaded question or doomed project.
Mikkel knocked on her cunningly carved door with complete confidence. This door was about four feet tall, a rather grandiose entrance way in Plaidie terms. It was carved long ago with obscure references to folk tales which should have been a warning to the wise. But it didn’t bother Mikkel.
The door opened slowly. It revealed a dark interior. Mother herself didn’t man the door. A severely domesticated red fox did. The fox examined Mikkel, might have grinned a bit, and then lay down on the stone paved floor by the open door, leaving it open. Perhaps that was meant to discourage the idea of a long interview with the Mother.
She sat at a desk, in an overgrown chair built of desiccated and polished Alder branches. The effect was somewhat Appalachian. Her hands were folded on the desk. Her long white hair was in a single braid which circled her head and dropped down to wind about her body. Of course her dress was plaid. Her face could be compared to something like a walnut with sharp little blue eyes. Her mouth was thin and rather wide. In short, she was scary looking.
Mikkel strutted his big flat feet over the stones of the floor to stand right before her desk.
He pulled his lower lip down in greeting, stomped three times and said, “I bow, Mother!” Then he did.
“Who are you?” she said. His blood ran a little cold.
“I am Mikkel Mooch, king of all Plaidies, Mother,” said he.
“I don’t see a crown. Where is the crown, Mikkel Mooch, the king of all Plaidies, indeed?” asked the Mother.
“That question is at the very nub of my seeking counsel!” said Mikkel.
“How is it that you style yourself king?” she frowned. The fox crept up to listen better.
“I was Wolvrin’s Hand, his minister in all things, and the next in power. When he fell, I rose,” said Mikkel.
“When he lost the crown to that Hairy Giant upstairs, he lost the crown down here as well, Madam!”
“I know.” She frowned again. “So what has that got to do with me, that you must come galumphing in here?”
“Mother, the crown lies at the bottom of a river. A simple matter to winkle it out except for one thing. Yon Hairy Giant sang a strong spell on me. It was No Return, and it’s a good one. It works!” said Mikkel.
“Hm,” said the Mother. “Let me think. You wait.”
He waited. She yawned and closed her eyes. Her head drooped. He sighed, but he waited. The fox looked at him with shining yellow eyes.
At last she looked up and said, “It’s a matter of definition. The song was made specifically for Mikkel Mooch. You must have a new name. Then you may return to the Great Forest and fish for the crown of coins.”
“Your wisdom astounds me, Mother! What name shall I carry henceforth?” exulted Mikkel.
“I shall name you!” She looked at him appraisingly and then said, “Lenny Lenovo. So be it. It’s done. Go your way Lenny. I’m quite finished with you! Ronald, see him out!”
While Lenny was still trying on his new name and getting it settled in, Ronald the fox got behind him and nipped him in his bare heel, just a wee bit, enough to get him moving. As soon as he stepped through the doorway, Ronald slammed the fancy door behind him...
Behind the throne in the throne room was a kind of natural hallway made of native rock. It started out as a normal hallway, but had been rehabbed into a kind of elevator, or ahem, portal for Plaidies. Now, none of the other Plaidies had been renamed, so they couldn’t use it to get to the Great Forest, but Lenny could.
In a twinkling, he was up there breathing forest air and seeing the sun and hearing the birds and all things pleasantly upper world. It was glorious and full of profitable possibilities.
But then Maeve spied him zipping along the forest paths like Sonic the Hedgehog, heading for the river and the crown of coins.
“I don’t think so,” she said to herself.
He never had a chance of escape. She dropped down out of the sky like a clap of thunder, like the wings of righteousness, like a huge black Raven with stunningly good eyesight. She grabbed him by his pigtail and soared back into the sky. She flew here and then there; she was searching for something or someone.
There he was!
He was sitting on a piece of driftwood quite near the river, trying to decide if it was flotsam or jetsam, or just driftwood. Also he was after some fish for dinner. Fish are a quick fix and much appreciated by Firekeepers everywhere.
It was hard to speak with that greasy braid in her beak, but when Maeve got to Ralph she said, “Boss! It came back! Look!”
“Wha?” said Ralph, squinting upward in disbelief.
Lenny was yelling, “let me go!!” at the top of his lungs, so she did.
Ralph caught him in midair! Lenny kept yelling to let him go.
“No. You look familiar,” said Ralph.
“I’m the king of all the Plaidies and I’m here to get my crown out of that blasted river,” said Lenny.
“You don’t look like Wolvrin to me,” said Ralph. “What happened to him?”
“He fell down and lost his crown, and we came tumbling after, as if you didn’t know,” said Lenny, just starting to feel his fey a little, like maybe he could control this giant. Poor Lenny.
Ralph could feel Lenny feeling it and he laughed softly to himself.
He understood how his song had been broken. It was a definition thing. Including a proper name in the definition was an area of vulnerability.
He understood that his opponent was the Mother of Plaidies, not this wriggling pretender shouting out demands in his raspy little voice.
“Very well, Madam,” Ralph murmured. “I shall do better this time.”
Ralph said, “Poof!” and Lenny
vanished, leaving Ralph’s hand empty.
“Wow, Boss,” said Maeve.
“He brought it on himself, dear Birdie,” he told her. She nodded gravely.
“Let’s get some fish and go home,” said Ralph.
So, he sang some gullible, curious trout to his hand, and popped them into a burlap bag until he had a dozen or so leaping around in the bag.
“Oh, one more thing,” he said. Then he stepped on the crown of coins, breaking it apart so that it was just a submerged heap of golden coins.
“Some worthy soul will find those, Maeve, and the coins will help them pay their way in the human world out there. I think that’s fitting.”
“We don’t need them,” said Maeve as she settled onto his shoulder for the ride home.
“That’s right. We have all we need right here and now!” said Ralph, quite joyfully.
While Mikkel thought, (plotted), he watched Wolvrin Farsukkil mop the throne room. What could have been more obvious. You lose the crown, you ain’t the king! The irony was delicious to Mikkel, but he didn’t really have time to savor it. He had to figure a way to beat the song of No Return, and return actually to get what was rightfully his, as was his belief.
He knew there must be a way. But what was it? In the meantime, he had to make his own kingship stick. The crown would seal the deal. He craved compliant obedience from the herd of Plaidies, not grudging and sullen acquiescence.
Now, in the world of the Plaidies, wherever that is, there was a Mother of Plaidies. She wore no crown, because she didn’t need one. Her power was uncontested. It seemed like she had always been there and that she would never die. None of them knew how old she was, or who had begat her on whom.
Mikkel Mooch, the king, decided to seek the counsel of the Mother. He knew she wasn’t all that invested in Wolvrin, and that she would likely help him break the song that kept him underground in the Plaidie throne room.
Many believed that the throne room was located in a hollow under Glacier Peak. Anything is possible! Sure, the Plaidies are faery folk, but they are a very localized PNW variety.
The Mother had her own separate quarters far from the throne room. She was not often visited there. She didn’t like idiots, and it was risky visiting her with some knuckleheaded question or doomed project.
Mikkel knocked on her cunningly carved door with complete confidence. This door was about four feet tall, a rather grandiose entrance way in Plaidie terms. It was carved long ago with obscure references to folk tales which should have been a warning to the wise. But it didn’t bother Mikkel.
The door opened slowly. It revealed a dark interior. Mother herself didn’t man the door. A severely domesticated red fox did. The fox examined Mikkel, might have grinned a bit, and then lay down on the stone paved floor by the open door, leaving it open. Perhaps that was meant to discourage the idea of a long interview with the Mother.
She sat at a desk, in an overgrown chair built of desiccated and polished Alder branches. The effect was somewhat Appalachian. Her hands were folded on the desk. Her long white hair was in a single braid which circled her head and dropped down to wind about her body. Of course her dress was plaid. Her face could be compared to something like a walnut with sharp little blue eyes. Her mouth was thin and rather wide. In short, she was scary looking.
Mikkel strutted his big flat feet over the stones of the floor to stand right before her desk.
He pulled his lower lip down in greeting, stomped three times and said, “I bow, Mother!” Then he did.
“Who are you?” she said. His blood ran a little cold.
“I am Mikkel Mooch, king of all Plaidies, Mother,” said he.
“I don’t see a crown. Where is the crown, Mikkel Mooch, the king of all Plaidies, indeed?” asked the Mother.
“That question is at the very nub of my seeking counsel!” said Mikkel.
“How is it that you style yourself king?” she frowned. The fox crept up to listen better.
“I was Wolvrin’s Hand, his minister in all things, and the next in power. When he fell, I rose,” said Mikkel.
“When he lost the crown to that Hairy Giant upstairs, he lost the crown down here as well, Madam!”
“I know.” She frowned again. “So what has that got to do with me, that you must come galumphing in here?”
“Mother, the crown lies at the bottom of a river. A simple matter to winkle it out except for one thing. Yon Hairy Giant sang a strong spell on me. It was No Return, and it’s a good one. It works!” said Mikkel.
“Hm,” said the Mother. “Let me think. You wait.”
He waited. She yawned and closed her eyes. Her head drooped. He sighed, but he waited. The fox looked at him with shining yellow eyes.
At last she looked up and said, “It’s a matter of definition. The song was made specifically for Mikkel Mooch. You must have a new name. Then you may return to the Great Forest and fish for the crown of coins.”
“Your wisdom astounds me, Mother! What name shall I carry henceforth?” exulted Mikkel.
“I shall name you!” She looked at him appraisingly and then said, “Lenny Lenovo. So be it. It’s done. Go your way Lenny. I’m quite finished with you! Ronald, see him out!”
While Lenny was still trying on his new name and getting it settled in, Ronald the fox got behind him and nipped him in his bare heel, just a wee bit, enough to get him moving. As soon as he stepped through the doorway, Ronald slammed the fancy door behind him...
Behind the throne in the throne room was a kind of natural hallway made of native rock. It started out as a normal hallway, but had been rehabbed into a kind of elevator, or ahem, portal for Plaidies. Now, none of the other Plaidies had been renamed, so they couldn’t use it to get to the Great Forest, but Lenny could.
In a twinkling, he was up there breathing forest air and seeing the sun and hearing the birds and all things pleasantly upper world. It was glorious and full of profitable possibilities.
But then Maeve spied him zipping along the forest paths like Sonic the Hedgehog, heading for the river and the crown of coins.
“I don’t think so,” she said to herself.
He never had a chance of escape. She dropped down out of the sky like a clap of thunder, like the wings of righteousness, like a huge black Raven with stunningly good eyesight. She grabbed him by his pigtail and soared back into the sky. She flew here and then there; she was searching for something or someone.
There he was!
He was sitting on a piece of driftwood quite near the river, trying to decide if it was flotsam or jetsam, or just driftwood. Also he was after some fish for dinner. Fish are a quick fix and much appreciated by Firekeepers everywhere.
It was hard to speak with that greasy braid in her beak, but when Maeve got to Ralph she said, “Boss! It came back! Look!”
“Wha?” said Ralph, squinting upward in disbelief.
Lenny was yelling, “let me go!!” at the top of his lungs, so she did.
Ralph caught him in midair! Lenny kept yelling to let him go.
“No. You look familiar,” said Ralph.
“I’m the king of all the Plaidies and I’m here to get my crown out of that blasted river,” said Lenny.
“You don’t look like Wolvrin to me,” said Ralph. “What happened to him?”
“He fell down and lost his crown, and we came tumbling after, as if you didn’t know,” said Lenny, just starting to feel his fey a little, like maybe he could control this giant. Poor Lenny.
Ralph could feel Lenny feeling it and he laughed softly to himself.
He understood how his song had been broken. It was a definition thing. Including a proper name in the definition was an area of vulnerability.
He understood that his opponent was the Mother of Plaidies, not this wriggling pretender shouting out demands in his raspy little voice.
“Very well, Madam,” Ralph murmured. “I shall do better this time.”
Behold
Creature
I bind
thee, by all that’s above.
In any
form you take,
You are
bound.
Trouble
me no more forever.
Return
to your lair.
Be king
there,
Forever.
“Wow, Boss,” said Maeve.
“He brought it on himself, dear Birdie,” he told her. She nodded gravely.
“Let’s get some fish and go home,” said Ralph.
So, he sang some gullible, curious trout to his hand, and popped them into a burlap bag until he had a dozen or so leaping around in the bag.
“Oh, one more thing,” he said. Then he stepped on the crown of coins, breaking it apart so that it was just a submerged heap of golden coins.
“Some worthy soul will find those, Maeve, and the coins will help them pay their way in the human world out there. I think that’s fitting.”
“We don’t need them,” said Maeve as she settled onto his shoulder for the ride home.
“That’s right. We have all we need right here and now!” said Ralph, quite joyfully.
🤍