"I Could Have Told You That!"

 

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            Suzy doesn’t spend as much time as she did B.T. (before them) hanging out at my desk debating with me. She’s usually in seclusion somewhere avoiding Them.
            Ah, but here she is. They must be asleep again.
            “Look. I’m an old lady cat,” she said. “I’ve been around a little bit.”
            “In a sense, that’s true,” I said. “You’ve been around for a little while. In this house, Suzy.”
            “I’ve had enough time to observe a few things, while being stuck in the house here,” she said from her perch on the arm of my chair.
            “You know it’s because we love you and don’t want you to get eaten by that raccoon out there. Right?” I said. “You’re in protective custody.”
            “Yeah, I know. But do you really think I couldn’t beat a raccoon?” she wondered.
            “No. I’m pretty sure the raccoon would beat you!” said I.
            “Well, be that as it may, you messed up today with that little beast, Sweetie. If you has asked me, as a Cautious™ Cat, I could have told you how to go about it. Especially since these are not normal cats, P!” sighed Suzy.
            “Well, what would you suggest, oh wise and Cautious™ old lady cat?” I said.
            “Toots and I have two possible suggestions. Both involve letting the wild little beast get used to the concept of water on his own time.”
            “Well, what?” I urged.
            “Numero Uno, you could just leave a trickle of water running in either sink and let them discover it, and that it’s not dangerous. You know how we feel about dangerous, right?
The other thing you could do is leave a shallow pan, like a rectangular plastic box of some kind with some warm water in it in the bottom of the shower. They already like to romp in there. They’d probably start playing in the water,” said Suzy.
            “Hm. Sounds easy, but the transition to me bathing them could still be tricky,” I said.
            “You have to understand, P, that you are dealing here with the whole Wild Kingdom, Cat Style, concentrated down into that tiny body. You need to ease up on them! Good grief. You don’t just walk up to the sink and turn on the water like he’s a dog or something! *shudder*
I could have told you!” she said.
            “But you didn’t!” I protested.
            “You didn’t ask,” she said, with a bit of gotcha in her tone.
            “I didn’t even intend to give him a bath. I just wanted to know that I could, in case he got fleas or something. Besides, it was the smallest stream the faucet would make.”
            “Doesn’t matter. You shocked him,” she said.
            “OK. OK. Tell Toots that I’ll try it your way. We’ll see what happens then!” I said.
            “Just check with me next time you get any great ideas. Harrumph,” she said.
            “Alright. I’ll check with you first,” I called to her retreating tail. I suppose she was going back into seclusion, since I could hear rustling and mewing somewhere nearby.

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"It's OK, Amigo!"

 

            Maybe if they could have been watching like a sort of Matriarchal Greek Chorus, Ralph’s mom, Wren, and her sisters, Poppy and Robin might have shaken their heads in motherly dismay. But what could they say or do as he usually came out on top, and he  had that virtual silver star in his forehead.
            Aunt Poppy might have counseled her sisters to watch and wait. She might have said, ‘You never know.’ I’m pretty sure that Wren could have said, ‘That’s for sure with that one. He is my first, and the one with all the wild notions.’
            ‘We know, Wren,’ Poppy and Robin could have said with indulgent smiles at their sister. Mothers are not above humble/bragging.
            Oh, you wonder what has these Motherly Souls taking some alarm? We’ll get there, but first some ground needs to be laid…
            Now, Ralph had enlisted Uncle Bob’s help in laying the slate floor in the Alder Tree House. It took them one whole day until nearly dark. First they had set up a kind of barrier, using pieces of slate all around inside of the circle of trunks. Then they spread the sand out and they walked it nice and even. Then, since Uncle Bob had kind of an artist’s eye for how things should go, he made the final decisions about how the slate pieces should fit together. When they were done it was a nice even slate floor. They walked around on it some more to make sure everything was packed in nice and tight. They were very pleased with their work, and rightly so. Ralph and Uncle Bob hoped that Leely would like it, that Twigg would approve.
            Looking upward, they could see that every day the branches were growing closer and tighter together. Very pleased, they wandered on back to the fire circle, where Ramona and Aunt Suzy had been making dinner for them.
            While Ooog thought up plans for finishing the house, Ralph and Uncle Bob had a few days off from the project. Ralph is a man of action, mostly, so with nothing to be done on the project, he was sort of at loose ends.
            Sometime previously to all of this, a western style hat company had opened in Milltown. Not only did the Amigo Hat Company sell hats, they also made them in an obscure metal building out by Payne Field, where many other things are also manufactured, quite near to the biggest building the world and all of that, if you go by footprints.
            As a lark, and a bit of advertising, Amigo made an extra super large cream colored “cowboy” hat. To build up a little interest in their hat company, Arnold, the boss, decided to call Millicent Price at the paper and offer the super duper sized hat to this mythical character she was always writing about in columns for the paper.
            OK. This is where things get a little far-fetched. Millicent told Arnold to bring his big hat on over to her office at the paper and she would make it, and Amigo Hat Company famous. So, Arold brought the very large hat to Millicent in person and she was suitably impressed. But her big window was also open because she was expecting Maeve to drop in that morning. Then she had to leave the room to talk to her own boss.
            Well, the wind was blowing pretty hard that morning and was feeling mischievous. The wind popped into Millicent’s window and nipped the hat off of her desk and blew it right out of her open window.
            It landed in the back of a Dodge pickup which was driven by a man who lived in Darrington and was heading home from some business in Milltown. The wind followed along, still feeling a frolic coming on. The wind is an agent of change, as we know.
            At just the right spot between Milltown and downtown Darrington, the wind whipped that big old hat so pristine and fine right out the back of the Dodge pickup, with the driver being totally unaware. It landed right smack on the edge of the Great Forest proper, caught about twelve feet up in the branches of a magnificent Douglas Fir.
            In the serendipitous fashion of Fairytales everywhere, Ralph found the hat! To say that he was pleased is to miss the point entirely. Ralph saw it there in the branches of the big tree and brought it down for inspection. He noted its size and its fine construction. He admired it greatly. He put it on his own big head. The stars aligned, it fit. Suddenly, Ralph was filled with that manly elation a man feels when he is wearing a great hat.
            He had just settled it on his head, correctly as it happened, and had turned to go show Ramona at home, when a kid of 8years, Toby, who had an iPhone, saw him from the backseat window of his mother’s SUV as she drove down the highway. Toby snapped one photo of Ralph just as he merged back into the forest. Toby showed his mother the photo when they got home. Mom was so excited about the photo that she in turn sent it to Millicent at the paper, since she was always writing about this Ralph character. But mom was cagey enough not to say where the photo was taken, and you can bet Millicent wouldn’t have either though she obviously knew.
            Honestly, Ralph looked just great in the hat. Can’t you just see him? 9feet tall, sable brown hair, clean and shiny, with the white streaks in either side of his beard, twinkly brown eyes full of amusement, all topped by the wonderful cream colored cowboy hat, which by some miracle fit him exactly. It was so perfect.
            Cherry saw him coming home from a long way off since she was up in the air a bit.
            “Mama, look,” Cherry said, pointing at Ralph as he approached.
            “Look, Mona! I found the hat,” Ralph called out happily.
            Ramona forgot what she had been doing and just watched him walk. She had to admit that there was something strangely glamorous in the whole effect.
            “Oh, Baby, it’s perfect,” said star struck Ramona.
            He didn’t wear the hat every day. But he did visit Ooog and Thaga to show it off.
            He wore it early one morning to show Rick and Dexter at the Ranger Station. It had a similar effect on all of these human people. They had to admit that he looked great in it, but were also sort of dumbstruck.
            After a couple of days Maeve spoke.
            “Boss,” said Maeve, trying to find the right words, but not finding them for once.
            “Oh, I know, Birdy,” said Ralph. “I can’t really keep it. But it was sure fun for a while.”
            “Do you want me to do something with it, Boss?” said Maeve.
            “Why don’t you take it to Milly! I bet she could write something about it!” said Ralph.
            “Seems like a good idea,” said Maeve. So the very next morning, a nice dry day with cloud cover, Maeve picked up the big hat by the back of its brim and took off, looking very strange up in the air. If anyone saw her, they probably thought they were tripping, and just let it go. Hopefully.
            Maeve flew the hat back into Millicent’s office window, but Millicent was out of the room. So after waiting around for five minutes, Maeve flew off again without talking to her.
            When Millicent got back to her desk and saw the hat, she just sat and looked at it for a while. It looked slightly worn. There was a sort of pinched area at the back of the brim, and it smelled like it had been in a forest.
            Then she went through her business emails and found the photo shot by Toby with his iPhone. It all started to make some kind of sense, but she could only guess about how it happened.
            Milly wrote up a heck of a story, illustrated with a large photo of the big hat and a smaller photo of Ralph’s backside disappearing into the forest. It was a great hit with both believers and amused skeptics, who wondered how she had faked the photo.
            So, back at the Matriarchal Greek Chorus, Wren, Ralph's doting mother might have said, “See, Poppy, see Robin! I knew my boy would be just fine! He always is!” And the other two would have to agree. Ralph always comes out just fine in the end.

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Wild Things!

             I’m a believer now. I watched several videos about pet Bengal cats and all they said was true. These are the wildest, fastest, loudest small kittens I have ever lived with, and they’re just tiny yet!

            I don’t think they are even all Bengal either. Even a half-breed Bengal cat is a wild thing.

            But, in addition to that they are utterly sweet and I believe that local hillbilly I bought them from, and his family socialized them very nicely. Thank you, William and family!

            So, I promise not to write about Booker and Sweetie every day for the rest of time, but I must say that I have fallen completely in love with the little infant predators.

            My beloved Granddaughter, who made the connection for me, tells me that the guy does in fact breed real Bengals. So, maybe they are Bengals! Time will tell!

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Ha Ha, Suzy!

 

It's very hard to get Suzy to sit for photo!

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            As you know, Suzy took a rather ambivalent attitude towards Booker and Sweetie. She did not run to them with licks, purrs, or open arms, so to speak, when they first came into her world. If anything, she wasn’t sure what they were, apparently.
            So, anyhow, I was supposed to be asleep yesterday, but I wasn’t. I was silently watching because there had been some noise in the area. And what I saw was Suzy playing with one of the kittens. I’m not sure which one because he was behind the door. He kept sticking his paw out from under the door or around its out edge. I saw Suzy swatting at it in a playful, friendly manner.
            Later, when she strolled by my desk, I said, “You don’t fool me, Suzy. I saw you!”
            “Hm?” she said. “Saw me what?”
            “You were playing with one of the kittens!” I said. “Behind the door!”
            “Oh, was that a kitten?” she said, evasively.
            “The only thing around here with furry paws, beside you or Mr. Baby is a kitten!” I crowed.
            “Oh, p’shaw. Pfft! I thought it was a snake,” said Suzy, continuing her stroll.
            “That’s really nice, Suzy! I’m glad to see you warming up to them,” I said.
            “I don’t know what came over me. All of a sudden I just felt like playing!” she said. As she walked off, tail high, she seemed a bit surprised at herself.
            It seems as if she has fallen right into her natural role as a lady cat!

😹

He Steps Forth

 

 
            Millicent Price, and all of her devoted readers of her columns in the Milltown paper, know that Ralph sings. He sings for pleasure and to please too. He sings as a form of prayer. Things really move when Ralph sings because he knows what’s what, and Who’s who.
            To the dwellers in the Great Forest, this is only natural, he is the one they look to, and he does his best to look after them. Ranger Rick probably hasn’t seen this in practice, but he wouldn’t be surprised after everything he has witnessed.
            A reader from Darrington, a cashier at the grocery, a little more up on things than most, sent a question in to the paper, directed to Ms. Price.
                        Dear Ms. Price:
                        As one of your most devoted readers, I felt free to send
                        you a simple question about your forest buddy, Ralph.
                        Does he dance too? I can only imagine.
                        Maybe you can elucidate?
                        Thanks, Emma T.
 
            “Well,” thought Milly, “If that’s not an opening, there isn’t any such thing!”
            As usual, enlisting Maeve, she set up an appointment to pick Ralph up for an interview. She had what she thought might be a fun idea for the meeting. She packed a big lunch. Deli Reubens, Gummi bears, obviously, bottled tea, Nanaimo bars too!
            Milly was pretty sure he would go for all of that.
            When she picked him up at the usual wide spot on highway 20 she said, “How about we have a picnic at the place we first met, Ralph? The beach on Camano island? Sound good?”
            “Sure, Milly. It’s been years. I’ve never been back. I wonder if it looks the same or if they built new park buildings or anything,” said Ralph.
            Ralph did that thing where he shrinks down a little to fit into the big green Escalade, put on a Cabela’s cap, and kinda looked a little obscure. He was thinking that a jacket might have been a good idea, but a jacket his size would have to be custom, and he didn’t want to bother Thaga about a jacket. Then he started paying attention to the ride, looking out of the window at the cool cloudy day passing by.
            Nobody was parked in the parking strip at the beach. A cool spring day with cloud cover doesn’t pull in the picnickers like a sunny one. An abandoned park was just what they wanted. Ralph noted that there were no new buildings. It was just as beat and shabby and comfortable as it had been the first time he had seen Milly.
            “I brought lunch!” said Milly, indicating a bag.
            “I know,” said Ralph. “I can smell it, looking forward to it!”
            The same picnic table waited for them in the same spot.
            Over lunch, Milly said, “I have a reader who wants to know if dancing is part of your repertoire. I got to thinking about it, and wondered myself. Do you dance? Why, if so? Do you sing to accompany yourself? I’ve heard about your singing, though I haven’t heard you, Ralph!”
            Still in his Cabela’s cap and in his smaller form, he was a very large presence across the table from Milly. He smiled. “Yes. In a word, sometimes I dance. I’m not sure it would look like dance to human people. There’s usually a good solid reason for it.
            “Like when I was setting up the Home Clearing. The Great Forest has always been there and always great, but I made it a little hard to find by certain steps. It’s such a physical thing that it’s hard to explain how it works. Thanks for the Gummi bears, by the way! Hard to beat a Gummi bear! And the sandwiches! And those bars, wow!
            “When I sing I try to square myself with what’s right, you know. I search for words to reveal truth, if that makes any sense. When I dance, it’s the same but maybe the postures seal the deal in my mind,” said Ralph, lapsing into silence, looking at Milly to see how she was taking all of this.
            “You know, Ralph. Maybe I’ll just tell the lady that yes, you do dance. I don’t feel like I could adequately explain what you just said. Or, I could tell her that it’s a form of prayer. How about that?” said Milly.
            “Pretty much covers it, in a word or two,” said he. “You know whatever you decide to say is fine with me!”
            “Some of them believe that I am writing about an actual person, but most of them don’t. They think it’s amusing fiction,” said Milly. “I think this lady knows something.”
            “Would you like a little lighthearted demonstration?” asked Ralph.
            “I think I could take it,” laughed Milly, but she looked a little tense.
            “OK, you watch me. I’ll do a little bit, and then you won’t have to drive me home. I don’t do this all the time, but it’s sure possible, if I want to,” he said, standing up. “See you next time, dear friend.”
            Ralph seemed to be humming a little bit, almost sub vocally. He winked, and began a little series of very smooth steps going backwards in the direction of the big Cadillac SUV. There was some arm action too. Soon between Ralph and Milly’s car there was a sort of shimmery area in the air like looking through rain spattered glass. It got more distinct and Ralph did his smooth stepping thing backwards right into it.
            Then he was gone. The beach was empty, except for Milly, her Escalade, and the leftovers from the picnic lunch, most just wrappings and a few Gummis in the bag lying on the table.
            “Wow,” said Milly to the air, the beach, and whichever gulls and such might be around. She stuck the remaining Gummis in her jacket pocket and walked the rest of it to the trash can.
            Then she drove back to Milltown with her mind full of wonder. She would tell Colin, but probably no one else.

🍀

Busy Kitten Days Continue

             The kids seem to be doing well. They run like crazy and then sleep a lot!
            They seem to be willing to eat anything edible, even cheese. I only gave them a sliver of white cheddar. I'm not sure it's good for baby cats.
            In low light it's difficult to tell them apart, but in good light Booker's face is lighter and he has stripes along his nose under his eyes, and Sweetie doesn't and his face is a little darker.

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February 19, 2026 - Open Thread

There's sunshine just down the road.

Spring is coming!

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