"Hey, Ralphie!"

 

            One fine morning Ralph was stretched out on his dear old cedar log. He was sensing each toe separately as a sort of meditation. He had gotten to the 7^th toe, and it was just about to spill some toe secrets about its life as a toe, when a familiar voice interrupted his pre-nap considerations.
            It was Uncle Bob.
            “Hey, Ralphie,” he said. “What’cha doin’?”  Bob’s friendly face looked down at Ralph’s startled one.
            “Um, thinking. What’s up, Bob,” said Ralph, rising to a sitting position, because he knew this wasn’t going to be a quickie. It never was. He mentally kissed his nap goodbye.
            “Have a seat, Bob, and let’s hear it, whatever it is,” said Ralph.
            Uncle Bob swarmed aboard Ralph’s log, but ended up facing the other way and had to turn around to talk. It took a minute.
            “I just remembered something! Usually I can’t remember anything that happened back after we grew up and I was still smoking so much. Did I ever tell you about the guy in the green truck I met one day?” said Bob. “He was a really nice guy!”
            “I don’t remember hearing about the guy in the green truck, Bob,” said Ralph. “What happened?”
            “All I remember is that I was lying on the ground by a road. My eyes were open and I was looking up at the sky wondering if it was gong to rain. I guess I was really close to the road because I heard a car or truck slow down like they were taking a look. And I was really worried that a human was looking at me laying in the grass by the road,” said Uncle Bob.
            “What happened then, did someone see you?” asked Ralph, to help the story along.
            “I guess he parked. The engine stopped running. I heard him get out of the truck. I peeked. It was an old green truck with a truck box thing on the back. Then I shut my eyes so maybe he would leave me alone!” said Bob, eyes wide.
            “Did it work?” said Ralph.
            “No, Ralphie! He came right up to me and said, ‘Are you alive?’ I sneezed. So, I guess he figured out I was alive. He said, ‘Why are you laying there by the ditch? You look dead. What’s the matter with you?’
            “It was freakier than heck, Ralphie. He wasn’t scared of me at all. He was just this dad looking guy in jeans and a white t-shirt. I wasn’t scared of him either I guess, so I got up.”
            “He said, ‘You look like hell. Are you hungry, or what?’ When he said that he smiled and I was really hungry. He guessed that right. I didn’t remember eating for a long time.”
            “He said he had a sack of groceries in the truck and why didn’t I come with him? I was so scared, Ralphie, but I was really hungry. So, I got into the truck. It was like a dream. There I was in a human’s truck!” whispered Uncle Bob.
            “Wow, Bob. You amaze me!” said Ralph. “Then what?”
            “He started up the engine and got back up on the road and drove down to a little dirt road. He turned in there, then turned the truck around so he was facing out. He parked again. He gave me some coffee out of a can thing with a lid. I didn’t know it was coffee back then, It was hot and brown and bitter, but I drank it anyhow. Then he gave me a banana. He had to show me how to peel it.
            “He laughed at me, but not mean. Then he gave me some kind of slices of meat put into bread. Then he opened up a paper bag of little things like sweet bread, I didn’t know about cookies back then. ‘Feel better, kid?’ he said, and I did. I ate all the cookies.”
            “You know, Bob. You were awful lucky he found you! You know that? It could have really gone wrong. Passed out on the road like that?” said Ralph. “Some fool might have freaked out and shot you!”
            “I know, Ralphie. I think he pretty much saved me,” said Uncle Bob.
            “How did you manage to understand each other?” said Ralph.
            “I don’t remember talking, but I understood what he said. Maybe it was that head thing? I don’t really know,” said Bob.
            “What’s the end of the story? I’m really curious,” said Ralph.
            “Not much. He gave me a bag of orange roots, or carrots. I didn’t know what they were. He told me to knock off whatever made me lay by the road looking dead. He showed me how the door handle worked and I got out. I said my thanks in our language, he nodded. I shut the truck door and watched him drive back out to the paved road. That’s all,” Bob said.
            “That was an unusual human,” mused Ralph.
            “It’s funny I forgot about him for so long,” said Uncle Bob.
            “He was right, wasn’t he?” said Ralph, giving Uncle Bob a sideways look.
            “Yeah. He was like somebody’s dad,” said Uncle Bob.
            “Funny it took you so long to get the message,” said Ralph.
            “But I did, Ralphie! I did! I really like having memories!”
            “Ah, Bob. Yes you did! Let’s go get some firewood for Ramona and Suzie. Make ourselves useful, eh?” said Ralph.
            “Good idea,” said Uncle Bob.

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